The period after self realization and coming into more and more of your truth is very confusing.

Self realization is the clear seeing of your true nature, you know who you are at the deepest level, and then everything that you have created in this reality comes forward for review. To be seen by the only thing that can redeem the energy back into its neutral state. 

To be seen by consciousness.

It’s quite strange because who you are feels like a That or a No-thing. 

How do we translate that? How does that fit into the fact that I’m still a human being walking the earth? How do I act in an authentic way as a That?

None of this comes with a handbook, its all a messy dance of trial and error and ups and downs.

I have found this period to be intense, confusing, humiliating and stupefying … just to name a few.

Its also been extremely clarifying, opening, and cleansing. The load gets lighter and lighter and it becomes easier when you understand what’s happening and can embrace it all. 

I’m still constantly finding pieces of myself that are operating in the dark. Parts that don't feel safe being here is the most recent “big find”.

“Other people aren’t safe, the world isn't safe. “

I know and sense that there is no other, that this whole universe is within awareness which is what I am and yet there are parts that are still acting out the game of other through me.

I feel the incongruence deeply and it’s what Im looking at now. 

The willingness to look at the layers as they present themselves is what keeps me acting from a place of authenticity rather than acting from a distortion.

It’s an embodiment of an aspect of my true nature which wants to see everything as it is. 

This is a daily practice for me, some things are easier to see then others. Some things are damn right near invisible and they don't dissolve away until I become aware of it and question its truth.

The understanding of this is constantly deepening. I thought I fully got this and then I realized I did not and that there’s so much more to discover here.

I’m always learning and expanding and making mistakes and brushing myself off for another round.

And its not that Im getting tougher as I go, I’m actually getting softer. More tender, more see through.

As the hardened parts dissolve I’m more like a pasta strainer as it all flows on through.

I’d love to hear about your experience with all this. Whether you’re approaching all of this before self realization or after, what has this been like for you? What does authenticity look like to you?

Thank you!!